As my regular readers know, I have depression. This has been going on for many years and I've had my ups and downs. The last 3-4 months or so have been bad, really bad but I am finally feeling that I'm emotionally stable to some extent. I know that this has been mainly because I've been working on myself to achieve the things I wanted to achieve in life. I've reevaluated what's important in life and I've learnt how to deal with certain things that hurt me before. But this is not a post about how I've dealt with depression, no this is a post to say thank you to the people that have been there for me.
I would say thank you for helping me to get out of it but that would be a lie. Depression is unfortunately not anything someone else can treat and as selfish as it sounds, I am the only one who has got myself out. However, I can thank you for being supportive, understanding and patient.
The last 4 months made me antisocial, negative and sometimes very difficult to deal with. As someone who has dealt with other depressed people I know that it takes a lot of energy to always have someone telling them how crap their life is. I'm fully aware of that I became a person who did the same. What surprised me was how many people I had around me that actually didn't mind hearing me say those things. Not only that, they wanted me to be able to share it with them so they could understand what I was going through.
I also blamed some of my friends. It was easier to put the responsibility on them than to actually deal with rejection, arguments and disagreements. Obviously it was their fault that I was upset and they needed to change. Now I know that in most cases it was mutual. There's never one person in a fight and sometimes I over reacted simply because I wasn't comfortable in my own skin.
There are many people to thank and even though I would want to thank each one of you individually I realised that it would be too emotional for me which led me to write this post.
I would like to thank all of you people that were there for me during these months, each in their own way. The patience you have with me has shown me that there are people out there that care about me and that I am proud to consider my friends. As someone who often goes through times when I think I don't have anyone this has shown me that it's all in my head.
To you it might just have been an act of kindness but to me it means the world. I hope that one day I'll be able to return all the love and kindness you've given me because that's the least I can do.
I still have a long way to go and I will never be perfect. I'll make mistakes and I'll be relying on people and push others away which is the wrong way to go but it's a learning curve and one day I'll get there hoping to have my friends waiting for me at the top.
I would say thank you for helping me to get out of it but that would be a lie. Depression is unfortunately not anything someone else can treat and as selfish as it sounds, I am the only one who has got myself out. However, I can thank you for being supportive, understanding and patient.
The last 4 months made me antisocial, negative and sometimes very difficult to deal with. As someone who has dealt with other depressed people I know that it takes a lot of energy to always have someone telling them how crap their life is. I'm fully aware of that I became a person who did the same. What surprised me was how many people I had around me that actually didn't mind hearing me say those things. Not only that, they wanted me to be able to share it with them so they could understand what I was going through.
I also blamed some of my friends. It was easier to put the responsibility on them than to actually deal with rejection, arguments and disagreements. Obviously it was their fault that I was upset and they needed to change. Now I know that in most cases it was mutual. There's never one person in a fight and sometimes I over reacted simply because I wasn't comfortable in my own skin.
There are many people to thank and even though I would want to thank each one of you individually I realised that it would be too emotional for me which led me to write this post.
I would like to thank all of you people that were there for me during these months, each in their own way. The patience you have with me has shown me that there are people out there that care about me and that I am proud to consider my friends. As someone who often goes through times when I think I don't have anyone this has shown me that it's all in my head.
To you it might just have been an act of kindness but to me it means the world. I hope that one day I'll be able to return all the love and kindness you've given me because that's the least I can do.
I still have a long way to go and I will never be perfect. I'll make mistakes and I'll be relying on people and push others away which is the wrong way to go but it's a learning curve and one day I'll get there hoping to have my friends waiting for me at the top.
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