Sometimes life gives you lemons...but you might not like lemonade.

We all have feelings. If you say you don't you must be a robot because having feelings is one thing that defines us as people. What you and me feel changes constantly and no one can ever feel exactly the same thing as you do. My happiness might be different from yours and your sadness might be something completely different from what I'm feeling. Because of this no one can tell us that what we're feeling is wrong. However, we can try to understand other people and relate to what they are feeling to similar experiences we've had in our lives. One thing that has struck me recently though is how we seem to think we can relate to other people's feelings when in fact we often close our eyes to what is really going on. Especially when someone is going through something difficult. I find this strange because it is completely normal to have bad days. We wouldn't be human if we didn't.
We all have bad days, some people more than others but we have all been there when we just want to stay in bed, pull the duvet over our head, put on Coldplay-Fix You and cry our eyes out. Usually what I do when I have those days is that I get up, put on my smile and pretend that everything in life is fine because as they say; When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. But recently I've realised that sometimes it's ok not to be ok. Why are we constantly told that we should be ashamed of being upset? When someone asks how you are they don't expect to hear the truth, they want to hear; I'm fine thanks. I think we all know that the words "I'm fine" are one of the most popular lies we tell each other. That lie is so easy to tell even though you would rather say "actually, I'm having a rough time at the moment and I would really like some support".
Recently I've seen two people that mean a lot to me go through a hard time. As their friend my instinct was to care, ask them if they want to talk and simply help as much as I can but sometimes there isn't anything you can do about it. You might just have to take a step back and let them deal with it their way but it is easier to know what to do if you know what is going on but the society has created some kind of stigma that if someone is depressed there is something wrong with that person. Let me tell you something, the only thing that is wrong are the people judging someone that needs help. We all need support sometimes and we shouldn't have to be ashamed of it.
If someone is depressed or simply just having a hard time it doesn't only affect that person but the people around are very likely to be affected too. It puts pressure on them to understand what is going on and how they should deal with it. I'm not an expert but I've learnt from experience that everyone copes with things differently. The best thing you can do is to accept what that person wants because in the end that's what you would want if you were having a bad day, week, month or even year.

This brings me to my final point, when life gives me lemons, I'm suppose to make lemonade.
But what if I don't feel like making lemonade one day or I might not even like it that much at all? Maybe I don't have enough sugar (positive things) and water to actually do it? There shouldn't be anything wrong with me not feeling well or having my issues. Having problems is a part of life and they teach us how to deal with different situations. We need to stop pretending that our lives are perfect because there is no such thing. I should be able to tell the truth when someone asks me how I am without having an awkward silence straight afterwards. I should be able to tell my friends that I'm depressed without being viewed as a freak and last, I should be allowed to take those freaking lemons and do whatever I want with them.