Everyone wants to achieve things in life. Some people want a career, some want a family and some want to beat the boss in the latest computer game. Regardless what you are doing you are constantly trying to achieve something. We often compare each other's achievements and decide whether someone is successful or not depending on what they've done in their lives but what we don't take into consideration is that everyone has different lives which means that some people will be able to achieve something easier than someone else and that makes this whole system wrong.
My last few months have been a living hell, at least in my opinion. I've suffered from depression and even though it's not the first time, this time has been the worst. However, even though I still have depression I'm starting to feel that I'm not suffering from it anymore, it's simply a part of my life that will make me stronger. But why does this make my achievements different from others? Well, for me it was a struggle to get out of bed. Not because I was tired, well I was mentally tired, but because I physically and mentally didn't want to get up and face the world. So the days when I went out of bed and got dressed was an achievement for me. I went against what my brain and body was telling me so I could do the things I had to do simply for the reason that if I have responsibilities I'm not going to let my mental illness define me. There are things that I needed to do so even though it was difficult I had to do it.
I've always had high expectations on myself. Partly from the people around me but mostly from myself. This meant that I would never accept to hand in coursework that I wasn't happy with and if I didn't get the mark I wanted I would be disappointed. However, this time I feel differently about it. Due to the problems I've had this last year accomplishing anything has become much more challenging than before. There were times when I considered dropping out from university and there were times I even doubted that I would be able to have a smile on my face and actually mean it. Now I know I can laugh without feeling that it's just a charade because I actually have things to be proud of. One of them is handing in my coursework on time. The fact that I managed to finish all my work when I barely wanted to live is the biggest achievement in my life so far. It proved to me and others that even when life isn't doing you any favors there is always a way to push through it and when you finally look back at all your struggles you'll realise that other people might achieve many things in their lives but that doesn't belittle your achievements at all. Even if your achievement is getting out of bed and put on clothes.
My last few months have been a living hell, at least in my opinion. I've suffered from depression and even though it's not the first time, this time has been the worst. However, even though I still have depression I'm starting to feel that I'm not suffering from it anymore, it's simply a part of my life that will make me stronger. But why does this make my achievements different from others? Well, for me it was a struggle to get out of bed. Not because I was tired, well I was mentally tired, but because I physically and mentally didn't want to get up and face the world. So the days when I went out of bed and got dressed was an achievement for me. I went against what my brain and body was telling me so I could do the things I had to do simply for the reason that if I have responsibilities I'm not going to let my mental illness define me. There are things that I needed to do so even though it was difficult I had to do it.
I've always had high expectations on myself. Partly from the people around me but mostly from myself. This meant that I would never accept to hand in coursework that I wasn't happy with and if I didn't get the mark I wanted I would be disappointed. However, this time I feel differently about it. Due to the problems I've had this last year accomplishing anything has become much more challenging than before. There were times when I considered dropping out from university and there were times I even doubted that I would be able to have a smile on my face and actually mean it. Now I know I can laugh without feeling that it's just a charade because I actually have things to be proud of. One of them is handing in my coursework on time. The fact that I managed to finish all my work when I barely wanted to live is the biggest achievement in my life so far. It proved to me and others that even when life isn't doing you any favors there is always a way to push through it and when you finally look back at all your struggles you'll realise that other people might achieve many things in their lives but that doesn't belittle your achievements at all. Even if your achievement is getting out of bed and put on clothes.
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