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Patriotic

I wouldn't call myself patriotic when it comes to Sweden since I've never really felt like I fit in. I know I am born and raised in Sweden which probably affected me more than I want it to. Feeling like I don't fit in where I come from and constantly trying to make sure that people do not think of me as swedish suddenly changed when I actually moved from Sweden.

I did quickly realise that it was something that created questions and interest amongst people. I wasn't just a student, I was an international student which got people to offer their support. Even though I want to be independent and grown up we all need support sometimes. Me being from Sweden has also led to a lot of comments an jokes. I am that kind of person used to making fun of myself and I do enjoy the jokes since it at least shows that the people around me have a clue of where I come from.

But there are times when they can't understand the culture I grew up with. Even though I live with jews and we have the jewish culture in common there are some things I wish I could share with them. It is not the same to sit and watch a swedish tv-program alone in my room or check the swedish news without having anyone to discuss it with. I don't find it difficult but it makes me miss home sometimes. It makes me want to be a part of the Swedish culture again.

I support the football team, the ice hockey team and everything swedish much more now then I did before, I miss the Swedish Eurovision song contest and all the swedish tv-shows I only can watch online. Even though the quality is really bad I miss watching it and hearing my own language.

By having these problems I've learnt that even though some people are trying to take distance from where they come from we always have that with us. Even though you might not fit in it is where you grew up. I won't say I'm proud of being Swedish but I am not ashamed of it. I have another culture behind me that I want to keep and that I should keep. It is my childhood and I need to take that with me where ever I go. I will learn about another culture here that I also will keep because in the end that makes me the person I will be when I find my own home where I want to join all these cultures together.

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